Team: No Compromise
Players: Adam Diggle, Alan England, Mikey Brenndorfer. Gary-max and nathanael have been injury stand ins in the past.
City: Auckland, New Zealand
How long have you played together?
Mikey: We started playing together around the beginning of 2012, when auckland was looking at organising some league play. We were me only team that stayed together for more than two months.
Mikey& Alan:: Personally, I think our best results were in Christchurch this year, where we managed to defeat some quality Aussie teams that we didn’t expect to beat. Winning the Nor Island champs was good as too. At the 2013 Australasians in Timaru, we came 9th= overall and 2nd= in NZ – again beating some really good Australian teams we expected to lose to. Pretty good results considering we don’t take polo seriously..
Diggle:-Reigning Champions of the Fish of Maui (Te Ika-a-Māui)
Where did your team name come from?
Mikey It came from Diggle, who was making fun of me and my vegan straightedge ways. And my vegan cycling cap that says no compromise. And it makes us sound tuff.
Diggle:-Poking fun at Mikey being vegan, then Alan went Vegan, then I gave it a go. we are all hypocrites on the inside.
Any training secrets you want to share?
Mikey: Play polo lots and have fun. Practice smiling in the mirror as often as possible.
Diggle:-Have fun, it makes it easier. Also do wheelies.
Alan: Other than not being a deck.. A chilled attitude and plenty of VB (New Zealand’s cheapest beer)
What is your best team memory?
Mikey: My favourite polo memory is probably the first tournament we played together, which was in Auckland. We didn’t play all the wonderfully, but it was so much fun. And Alan gave me coffee, and I don’t usually drink coffee, and the caffeine made my brain work in weird ways.
Diggle:-Scoring golden goal against The Creatures of The Ocean Deep at Timaru through all 4 BBs.
Alan: Probably sleeping together in Chch for the winter whack, where I found out about Mikey’s special “basketball shorts for sleeping.”
Pick a song to decribe each of your team mates?
Mikey: Girls just wanna have fun.
Diggle:-Mikey – H2O-What Happened? Alan – ODB Baby I Got Your Money
Alan: Mikey: Hot Potato – The Wiggles http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBWQCHb95rg Adam: Wu-Tang Clan Ain’t Nuthing Ta Fuck Wit – Wu Tang http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8keTv_vpwLc “And if you want beef, then bring the ruckus”
What heckles work on your team mates?
Mikey: The only heckles that work on us are distraction heckles. Most of the time we are heckling ourselves just much as much as heckling other teams.
Diggle:-nothing works on Mikey’s zen. Alan doesn’t like to be told to do wheelies.
Alan: Anything that makes them laugh, which is most things.
Which team do you love playing and which team do you hate playing?
Mikey: I had loads of fun when we played Damon, Will, and gosh I can’t remember her name because I am a dick, when they came for the Auckland tournament. More science less fire. I hate playing teams that can’t smile and keep it positive.
Diggle:-love Wellington, hate lefties. (fuck this lefty bullshit)
Alan: Wellington teams.. Love playing Creatures of the Ocean Deep cause the game is usually hysterically funny.. I’m talking crying, and stomach cramps funny. They are great dudes. Hate/Love playing the Hurry Hards.. We are pretty evenly matched so always afraid they will win. Hasn’t happened yet though.
We know what happens on the road, stays on the road, but really what has happened on tour with you guys? Do your team mates have any really bad habits?
Mikey: My team mates woke up me in the middle of the night while I was asleep and they were drunk, cause they wanted to play some midnight polo in the car park in hawkes bay last year.
Diggle:-Alan Snores, Mikey is obsessed with playing farmville on his iPad.
Alan: Adam has a bad habit of encouraging drunk polo. It was his idea to do beer goals on our last game at the Nth Island Champs. Mikey is pretty much a perfect human with no bad habits.. Oh no wait, he is addicted to a silly farmville game that he insists isn’t farmville. (It’s farmville)
Mikey: IT’S NOT FARM VILLE YOU GUYS ARE DICKS I HATE YOU!
Your plane crashes in a remote location. Only you three survive. There is no food to be found. Which team mate do you eat first?
Mikey: I’d offer myself first, but I doubt that anyone would find much meat on my bones. Skinny vegan ass.
Diggle:-They are both vegan, so they wouldn’t eat me, I would feel bad eating them but I would give them the choice. Possibly a fight to the death to keep it fair?
Alan: That’s a hard one as both me and mikey are vegan… So pretty sure Mikey and I would paper scissors to see who gave up their body parts first. Probably me as Mikey is a nurse, and therefore qualified to do amputations.
Photographs by Rachel Callander and Richard Brown